*Nine Lessons from Surah Hujurat*
Credit to the original author. (Not written by Aliza Kim.)
"When a glass breaks, the sound of breaking disappears immediately, whereas the glass pieces are scattered all over, hurting whoever walks over it". Similarly, "When you say something that hurts someone's emotions and feelings, your words disappear, but in the heart remains pain for long." Therefore, don't say anything except good and always remember the nine advice and prohibitions that Allah has given in Surah Hujurat (The Surah of manners) before you say anything to anyone:
"Fa Tabayyanu": Investigate: whenever you receive an information, lest you harm people out of ignorance.
"Fa Aslihu": Make settlement: between your brothers as believers are brothers.
"Wa Aqsitu": Act justly: whenever there is a dispute try for settlement and act justly among both parties as Allah loves those who act justly.
4. *لا يسخر*
"La Yaskhar": Don't ridicule people, perhaps they may be better than you to Allah.
5. *ولا تلمزوا*:
"Wa La Talmizu": Don't insult one another.
6. *ولا تنابزوا*:
"Wa La Tanabazu": Don't call each other with offensive nicknames.
7. *اجتنبو كثيرا من الظن*
"Ijtanibu Kathiiran min Aldhan": Avoid negative assumptions, indeed some of the assumptions are sins.
8. *ولا تجسسوا*
"Wa La Tajassasu": Don't spy on each other.
9. *ولا يغتب بعضكم بعضا*
"Wa La Yaghtab": Don't backbite about each other. It's a major sin equivalent to eating your dead brother's flesh.
Exactly! The fear of consequence seems to disappear when people bully or disrespect others publicly online. That is changing. People, including myself are starting to “expose” or “call out” these people to hopefully show there can be and will be a consequence to this behaviour. I do not do this to bully back. I will not call them names or personally attack them, I will however attack their behaviour, as it NEEDS TO STOP 🛑 I know some people are actually just in a bad space and need a lot of help themselves. But sometimes these bullies are people that should just know a hell of a lot better and would not tolerate that sort of behaviour from others in their own world. If you have opinions on others and want to gossip share them privately with your friends. Don’t post about them publicly for all to see. Online bullying is a major problem with our young kids and teens - we as adults don’t need to be conducting the exact same behaviour we are trying to stop. AND before you come at me and say I’m doing exactly the same thing back by “exposing” them, don’t. The soft approach is proving over years and years of distressing and horrific circumstances of the result of online bullying to not be working. I’m doing it my way to stamp it out. Join me - do it your way, my way, someone’s else’s way - whatever. Just do something to show online bullying won’t be tolerated in your world. #stopbullying#dontberude#dontbemean#getbackwhatyouputout#wiseup#stop
Which is Bold Selfishness 🤦🏾♀️🤢🥴 AKA
“it’s always about me behaviour”. It’s very unflattering.
Everyone going through something but how does someone recognise their un-desirable behaviour and attitude?
I want you all to have a great day
I will talk about this on my story’s today.
I don’t give a shit whether as a girl you wear a lot of make up or you wear none.. Go you 🙌 you look beautiful either way. What I can’t stand is those same girls with tons of makeup/ten million filters calling girls who don’t wear a lot of makeup ugly or basic or what ever! Stop pulling other girls down.. it isn’t attractive. Go a day without any makeup or post a picture without a filter then you’ll see where the real beauty is! Get real! #womanswoman#dontbemean#nomakeup#aunaturale#youalllookthesame#freethefreckles
It’s Friday! The weekend is here.
I am exhausted, Peyton has croup which is really playing havoc with her asthma so she slept in bed with me last night- poor hubs had to sleep on the sofa -and we had a maximum of 2 hours sleep 😑 super tired.
Anyway, if you read a few posts back about Autism, you will know that there are a few things going on in our house at the moment. So Riley, is really, really struggling to make and maintain friendships. It’s not because he isn’t a super lovely and cool kid, because he is. But rather because he is so desperate to impress people that he can make himself look a tad silly.
Yesterday, while picking him up, I heard a few of the older boys making fun of him and laughing about him. Even though he hadn’t heard it due to still being in class, it broke my heart.
After taking Peyton to the doctors yesterday evening, we walked home and a different group of older boys were walking towards us, as soon as they saw me, they started making silly noises and going “blah blah blah…Riley” they were looking right at us and laughing. I felt so mad. If only they would give him a chance.
Yes he has a tendancy to act very immature and like a bit of a plonk but he’s 10! That is still super young. If only they knew how much he would appreciate their friendship, how much he has to give and how big his heart is.
In a way, I am so glad they aren’t his friends, I would rather him act silly than be rude, unkind and insensitive towards others. That is no way to treat others, regardless of if they have special needs or not. Everyone is human, everyone has feelings and everyone wants to feel like they belong.
I am just so glad that Riley wasn’t there when these happened. I know I have said previously that he (and the other 2) can be right A** holes, and they can but they are all emotional children, they crave friendships and approval. It would hurt him so deeply if he had been there.
I love all of my kids deeply and all I want is for them to be happy.
Just be nice. It is really simple.
Enjoy your evening
We should treat our fellows with the same respect we wish to receive, therefore going with that logic, if a person beats up their dog the dog should be able to have a go at them and not be put down. Let's just say that if every human in this world who harmed an animal was killed there would be a lot less people!
Do you need to vent about something... do so here and receive a loving comment back
What people see vs what you SHOULD see...
I face this quite regularly and I feel probably all of us do.. so what do people who are negative towards me see ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
👁 She’s such a princess, spoilt, loud, bossy, thinks she so good, ugly, chubby, distant... and more
What I KNOW I am
💋Determined, strong minded, open with the right people, works hard, build my own empire and wardrobe, everything I got is from MY money, ambitious, hitting weight loss goals, appreciate my inner and outer beauty, I have some self esteem issues, loyal, honest AND SO MUCH MORE!
💋Also for all of you going through the same who have that colleague, friend or unnecessary negative person around you JUDGING, BITCHING, WISING YOU NOTHING BUT BAD LUCK just ignore them YOU GOT THIS💪🏼
💋You know your path, you know your worth and you know YOU! so in the most politest way possible these negative nancies can Fuck Off and keep hating because my STRONG, DETERMINED and KIND HEARTED Women or Men aren’t going anywhere!!
💋 Do you need to vent about something... do so here and receive a loving comment back #achievement#bitchypeople#byenegativity#dontbemean#standup#shoutout#ownit#bethebestyou#beonlyyou#journey#moveforward#mirror#innerbeauty#outterbeauty#hatersarefanstoo#byefelicia#watchmerise
Does it hurt to just be kind?
Will it hurt someone if you opened the door for them?
Would someone feel upset if you gave them flowers?
Would someone feel angry if you said a very kind word?
Would someone feel degraded if you built them up with compliments ?
We can choose every single day to show kindness. So why don't we?
We are not a perfect family. We make mistakes just like everyone else but we are a compassionate family and we never like to see others in pain and we try to always do the right thing. As of this morning British Airways as done just that, they did the right thing. They are refunding the money that we spent for our airfare to Paris!
Thank you to everyone who had compassion for us, or just a little bit of understanding that something like this could happen to anyone. Thank you to everyone who called or offered to contact the airlines or to do anything they possibly could to help us. Thank you to the people who kept their mean thoughts to themselves and were just here to support us personally. Thank you to everyone who shared our original post and helped to get our story out. Not just for our benefit but for others who may not know about this and may have gotten into a similar situation as us. I would not wish that disappointment on anyone. Please share this post as well to get our thank you back to British Airways. So many people were so quick to call us idiots, to say we deserve what we got, to laugh at us or just to say that no one will care at all what happened to us and some people even tried to turn this into a political thing which it 100% had nothing to do with politics but that is the way of the world anymore. Everything is political and everyone is out to get each other. To those people who said mean or hurtful things I hope nothing bad ever happens to you and you have to reach out for compassion from others because karmas a bitch!
Girls support girls, don't tear each other down like society does. You need to stand up for each other. Don't go trying to break up a girl and her boyfriend because you like him. Don't go calling them names because they looked at you funny or looked at your man. Maybe they were having a bad day or they were just glimpsing over everything and you happened to notice when their field of vision was passing him. We need to be there for each other. You have no idea what is going on in someone's life and calling them names or disrespecting them is not gonna help anything. Ever. Support each other and be there for each other. You don't want your school turning out like the school from the movie mean girls where all the girls start attacking each other do you? You wouldn't want someone saying mean things to you so don't say mean things to anyone else. #girlssupportgirls#dontnamecall#keepittoyourself#support#girls#meangirlsrelated#dontbemean#youneverknow#nodisrespect
First job after uni, didn’t like the department whatsoever and the manager was a crock of shit. She pissed me off one day, and as I’d already handed my notice in, I let her have it. We’ll call her Jen - I said ‘Jen, you’re a smart woman but you’re absolutely terrible at managing people. This position just doesn’t suit you and you’re making everyone miserable. Go and do something else.’ She didn’t come back with the smart remark I was expecting...she started crying, and she didn’t stop. I had to help her into her office and I sat and listened as she vented every frustration and woe she’d ever had in life. I felt like Lucifer himself. I didn’t retract my statement as I meant every word, but I did apologise for making her feel like shit. She also apologised for and admitted to being a bad manager...should’ve got that moment on tape.
As it happens, I bumped into her years later, new job, less responsibility...overall, a much happier Jen.
Lesson: Always try to be kind - you don’t know what battles folk are fighting.
Part of being a naïve nelly is that I see the good in people. I believe people when they speak. I don’t understand why people would say something they don’t mean. But I am harshly realizing that this is not how other people are. 😑 If you don’t want to spend time with me, don’t tell me you will or that you want to, because if you want to, you will. I know my self worth and I know that I’m an incredible human. ♥️ I’m busy living my best live so either join me or best of luck on your own adventure. 👏🏼 #monday#motivation#dontbemean#iaintgottimeforthat#selfworth#believeinyourself#empowering#bekind#love
In this world women have enough to deal with, let's not have dealing with mean girls be part of it. Be nice. Support each other. You may not agree with my cause or the message of Carry Girl and I may not agree with you. But we must respect each other. Being mean to another women isn't productive and puts so much negativity in the world...for what? The amazing part of living in this great country is that we can have different views and opinions about different issues. That's ok!! What's not ok is belittling or name calling. So, dont be mean. Just support people. Be Nice, it's cool!! #benice